There's a reason holiday season grief hits differently. These are the days built on tradition, togetherness, and memory—the very things that remind us of who's missing. Whether it's your first holiday without them or your tenth, the waves of emotion can catch you off guard.

You might find yourself wondering how to remember dead loved ones in ways that feel authentic, not forced. Or maybe you're trying to balance honoring their memory with creating new traditions for the family members who are still here.

The good news? There's no single "right" way to do this. What matters is finding approaches that bring you comfort and keep your loved one's spirit woven into your celebrations.

One of the most natural ways of honoring loved ones is to give them a visible place in your holiday celebrations. This doesn't have to be elaborate—sometimes the simplest gestures mean the most.

Consider setting up a small memorial corner with their photo, a candle, and perhaps their favorite holiday decoration. Some families hang a special ornament in their honor, while others leave a place setting at the table with a candle or flowers. These holiday memorials become touchstones throughout the season—quiet reminders that love doesn't end.

There's something profoundly comforting about the ritual of lighting a candle. Whether you do this during holiday meals, religious services, or quiet moments alone, that small flame becomes a beautiful symbol of the light your loved one brought into your life.

You might establish a tradition of lighting it at the same time each evening during the holiday season, or invite family members to share a memory each time it's lit.

Did they always insist on a certain dish at Thanksgiving? Make the world's best hot chocolate? Have a particular way of wrapping gifts that drove everyone crazy but made them smile?

Keep those traditions alive. Cook their signature recipe (even if it doesn't turn out quite the same). Wrap presents their way. Play their favorite holiday music. These acts of remembrance become a way of honoring loved ones that feels active rather than passive—you're not just missing them; you're celebrating what made them uniquely them.

Sometimes honoring loved ones means building something new. Consider starting a tradition like:

• Writing letters to them and placing them in a memory box

• Donating to their favorite charity in their name

• Taking a walk to their favorite spot on a significant holiday

• Baking cookies together as a family while sharing stories about them

• Creating a holiday playlist with songs that remind you of them

These new rituals give everyone—especially children—concrete ways to process grief and keep memories alive.

Here's something that doesn't get said enough: you don't have to be "over it" by the holidays. You don't have to put on a brave face. And you certainly don't have to skip celebrations entirely if you're not ready for them.

Holiday season grief is complicated. You might laugh at a joke and feel guilty. You might sob during a carol that used to be your favorite. You might feel nothing at all, and that's okay too.

The healthiest approach to honoring loved ones is to give yourself grace—to feel what you feel without judgment and to let others support you through it.

Holiday memorials can take many forms, depending on what feels right for your family:

A Candlelight Service: An evening gathering where family and friends share memories, light candles, and find comfort in community. These work beautifully during Advent or Hanukkah, incorporating the season's natural emphasis on light.

A Celebration of Life Brunch: A morning gathering after the main holiday, where people share favorite stories over a meal that includes your loved one's favorite foods.

A Tree Planting or Memorial Garden Dedication: For families who prefer outdoor tributes, dedicating a living memorial can provide a lasting place to visit and remember.

An Annual Memorial Gathering: Some families establish a tradition of meeting each year on a specific date—perhaps your loved one's birthday or the anniversary of their passing—to share memories and stay connected.

We'll work with you to create a service that captures their unique spirit. Since 1897, the families we serve have taught us that no two people are alike—which means no two memorials should be either.

Grief doesn't wait for convenient moments, and neither do we. Our team is available 24/7/365 because we know that questions, emotions, and needs don't keep business hours—especially during the holidays.

Whether you're planning a memorial service or simply need guidance on how to navigate this first holiday season without your loved one, we're here. Our compassionate staff can help you:

• Plan a meaningful holiday memorial service in our beautiful chapel or reception area

• Coordinate with family members who may be traveling from out of town

• Arrange tribute videos, memory tables, or other personal touches

• Navigate the emotional challenges of the season with grief support resources

• Pre-plan services that ease the burden on your family in the future

We understand that trust matters, especially during vulnerable times. That's why we own and operate our own Lakepointe Crematorium in Lake Elsinore, where licensed Alhiser-Comer personnel handle all cremations. This complete continuity of care means your loved one never leaves our care—a detail that brings many families peace of mind.

Our Escondido location on South Broadway offers a comforting environment where families can gather, remember, and heal. From our serene chapel to our welcoming reception area, we've created spaces designed to honor life and support those left behind.

You're welcome to visit anytime, tour our facilities, or simply ask questions. There's no pressure, no obligation—just genuine care from people who understand what you're going through.

Honoring loved ones during the holidays isn't about getting it perfect. It's about finding small, meaningful ways to say, "You're still with us. You still matter. We're carrying you forward."

Some days that might look like lighting a candle and feeling their presence. Other days it might mean crying in the grocery store because their favorite cookies are on sale. Both are valid. Both are part of the journey.

If you're struggling with how to remember dead loved ones this season, or if you're considering a holiday memorial and don't know where to start, we're here. Call us anytime at (760) 745-2162, or stop by our Escondido location. We've been supporting families through their most difficult moments for over 125 years, and it would be our privilege to support you too.

Because here's the truth: you don't have to navigate this alone. And your loved one's memory deserves to be honored in whatever way brings you comfort, healing, and peace.